Post by Lady Cattenborough on Oct 28, 2012 0:44:12 GMT -5
Writing is hard, not to mention supr srs biznez. There is a trend, amongst wolf roleplayers, that is renowned (and hated) throughout the rest of the roleplaying community. It's called "wolf speak." It's a brand of purple prose so horrific, it makes English teachers everywhere turn to alcoholism. But what is purple prose, and how can you avoid it and all that comes along with it?
What is Purple Prose?[/u]
Purple prose is, at its core, the worst writing style, one that is accepted among some circles of writers, for no apparent reason. It is a style of writing where one will use poetic terms (like "raven locks," "ebony fur" meaning "black," ebony is brown guise) and, usually, big walls of text that seem to go on and on without going anywhere.
Wikipedia defines purple prose thusly:
This example was written for us by the Hon. A. B. F. Polar Bearington.
"The woman was wearing red lipstick - it was red like a cherry. Red like a strawberry. Red like Elmo, or a lobster, or mars. The kind of red that might cause one to think back to the old days, when grandpa used to gather us kids around the orchard, and we'd go and pick apples all day. That kind of red."
But Isn't That Just Description?
In a word? No. In a few? Jesus Christ, fuck no. Why not? Because that's an entire paragraph describing the colour of lipstick, which doesn't matter to the story and serves only to draw attention to itself and draw out the paragraph.
Here's a better way to describe this woman's lipstick:
"The woman was wearing cherry red lipstick."
Wow, how hard was that? There's no unnecessary information, and instead, there's room for a lot more information in the paragraph. If this were my passage, I would write it like this.
"The woman sitting at the table had black, wavy hair to her shoulders, and wore cherry red lipstick. Her clothing was form-fitting, and black as well, and she leaned an elbow on the table, a smoking cigarette holder in her hand."
This paragraph was shorter than the original, but held much more information. To put it simply, purple prose is boredom in the guise of description, who is secretly stealing soap every time it excuses itself to go to the bathroom. Purple prose is the massive dick at the literary dinner party, and no one wants to be friends with it, except its mother, Shitty Romance Fanfiction.
But Purple Prose Has Cousins[/u]
And to continue the metaphor I have grown oddly fond of, these cousins go everywhere purple prose does, grabbing up soap and napkins and pens and that present your grandmother got you from her trip to Naples. But what are they?
All of these things are terrible and must be avoided.
I Think I'm A Flowery Writer- Help![/u]
Have no fear - with proper instruction, advice, and willingness, you too can break free of your navel-gazing, purple prosing habits. Your Local Roamer and your Lady of Cats can assist with critique and resources for the aspiring writer, with help from our local polar bear population.
Party on!
What is Purple Prose?[/u]
Purple prose is, at its core, the worst writing style, one that is accepted among some circles of writers, for no apparent reason. It is a style of writing where one will use poetic terms (like "raven locks," "ebony fur" meaning "black," ebony is brown guise) and, usually, big walls of text that seem to go on and on without going anywhere.
Wikipedia defines purple prose thusly:
"Purple prose is a term of literary criticism used to describe passages, or sometimes entire literary works, written in prose so extravagant, ornate, or flowery as to break the flow and draw attention to itself. Purple prose is sensually evocative beyond the requirements of its context. It also refers to writing that employs certain rhetorical effects such as exaggerated sentiment or pathos in an attempt to manipulate a reader's response."
This example was written for us by the Hon. A. B. F. Polar Bearington.
"The woman was wearing red lipstick - it was red like a cherry. Red like a strawberry. Red like Elmo, or a lobster, or mars. The kind of red that might cause one to think back to the old days, when grandpa used to gather us kids around the orchard, and we'd go and pick apples all day. That kind of red."
But Isn't That Just Description?
In a word? No. In a few? Jesus Christ, fuck no. Why not? Because that's an entire paragraph describing the colour of lipstick, which doesn't matter to the story and serves only to draw attention to itself and draw out the paragraph.
Here's a better way to describe this woman's lipstick:
"The woman was wearing cherry red lipstick."
Wow, how hard was that? There's no unnecessary information, and instead, there's room for a lot more information in the paragraph. If this were my passage, I would write it like this.
"The woman sitting at the table had black, wavy hair to her shoulders, and wore cherry red lipstick. Her clothing was form-fitting, and black as well, and she leaned an elbow on the table, a smoking cigarette holder in her hand."
This paragraph was shorter than the original, but held much more information. To put it simply, purple prose is boredom in the guise of description, who is secretly stealing soap every time it excuses itself to go to the bathroom. Purple prose is the massive dick at the literary dinner party, and no one wants to be friends with it, except its mother, Shitty Romance Fanfiction.
But Purple Prose Has Cousins[/u]
And to continue the metaphor I have grown oddly fond of, these cousins go everywhere purple prose does, grabbing up soap and napkins and pens and that present your grandmother got you from her trip to Naples. But what are they?
- Putting Speech In The Middle Of The Paragraph Jones. You're supposed to start a new paragraph every time a character speaks. Speech in the middle of a paragraph is stupid.
- Colour-coding Speech McGee. This is something you wouldn't need to do if you started a new paragraph every time someone speaks. Like. You're. Supposed. To, because it'll otherwise drown in a sea of pointless nonsense.
- Tiny Font Tony. This one, I don't even get. It's straining to read and mostly looks blurry to me. In fact, I often have to copy-paste small font into notepad just to read it.
- No Paragraph Breaks "The Wall" Smith. The definition of a paragraph is not x number of sentences. A paragraph is an entire thought - and so you may have a paragraph a single word long. However, if your paragraph is above 6 sentences, consider putting in a break, or else suffer the "didn't read lol" demon.
- Mary "I Hope Senpai Notices Me" Sue. We all know this one. The Mary Sue and her other genders are the bane of literacy. One-dimensional characters who are loved by all for no reason, usually with a tragic past, are terrible. See this guide for tips on avoiding her.
- Fancy Post de la Gaiason. This particular brand of god in heaven why is prolific amongst the Gaia roleplay forum. It involves sparkly banners, pretty pictures, multi-coloured text and chains of random symbols that do nothing but make the place look messy.
All of these things are terrible and must be avoided.
I Think I'm A Flowery Writer- Help![/u]
Have no fear - with proper instruction, advice, and willingness, you too can break free of your navel-gazing, purple prosing habits. Your Local Roamer and your Lady of Cats can assist with critique and resources for the aspiring writer, with help from our local polar bear population.
Party on!